I think I'm on a plateau. A mental plateau. I'm tired - mentally. Am I ready to quit? Absolutely not. I'm not going back. I won't.
Physically - doing ok. With the exception of my left hip which hurts and my knees - not constant but achy. My hip - needs a break from running.
I will finish later. I have a lot of thoughts and I'm holding my baby girl which is just not conducive to typing.
What is going on -- it's 9:45 PM and I'm sitting here - feeling slightly sick and very guilty. I bought a Skor candy bar today. I carried it around in my purse - I never ate it.
My brother and his wife came down and we went to dinner. Mexican. Oh so yummy. I got the Chili Verde dinner - Chunks of pork with grilled tomatoes, onions and green pepper with rice and beans on the side. Chips and salsa were the appetizer. I ate some chips - oh so yummy. Dinner came and I ate the rice and beans - oh so yummy. I only ate a 1/4 of my pork. I was stuffed. It was all so good.
We drove up the canyon - looked at the water fall and the leaves. So pretty - love fall! Then on the way down the canyon I remembered that silly candy bar. I started breaking of small pieces and piece by piece -- I ate that candy bar. I haven't had a candy bar for MONTHS. Why now? Why today?
Keelie wrote about her anxiety. I was experiencing anxiety around the same time. I was so excited about my kids going to school - Yeah! A whole day to myself. Wrong. Anxiety sets in every morning around the same time. I feel so much pressure to get everything done while they are gone. It's like a time bomb. I have a big PTA assignment and for two weeks trying to get it done -- anxiety. My head starts to spin, my shoulders get tight. I can't organize any thought. It is disabling. Why? This hasn't happened for quite a few years -- why now? I thought I had gotten it under control - wrong. anxiety today. ON A SATURDAY! What the heck?
I can't quit. It all can't come back. I've worked too hard. What now? How do I get my mind motivated again? It's competing with so many things. Breath..... Breath..... Breath.....
I've got to get back to the basics. I'm not going to sit 3 pounds away from a 50 pound loss and not achieve it. Fruits, veggies, water, dairy, low fat protein. Back to the basics. That means attending Weight Watchers-- not just weighing in.
I can do hard things! I have done hard things! I've come a long ways! COME ON!!!
What is going on -- it's 9:45 PM and I'm sitting here - feeling slightly sick and very guilty. I bought a Skor candy bar today. I carried it around in my purse - I never ate it.
My brother and his wife came down and we went to dinner. Mexican. Oh so yummy. I got the Chili Verde dinner - Chunks of pork with grilled tomatoes, onions and green pepper with rice and beans on the side. Chips and salsa were the appetizer. I ate some chips - oh so yummy. Dinner came and I ate the rice and beans - oh so yummy. I only ate a 1/4 of my pork. I was stuffed. It was all so good.
We drove up the canyon - looked at the water fall and the leaves. So pretty - love fall! Then on the way down the canyon I remembered that silly candy bar. I started breaking of small pieces and piece by piece -- I ate that candy bar. I haven't had a candy bar for MONTHS. Why now? Why today?
Keelie wrote about her anxiety. I was experiencing anxiety around the same time. I was so excited about my kids going to school - Yeah! A whole day to myself. Wrong. Anxiety sets in every morning around the same time. I feel so much pressure to get everything done while they are gone. It's like a time bomb. I have a big PTA assignment and for two weeks trying to get it done -- anxiety. My head starts to spin, my shoulders get tight. I can't organize any thought. It is disabling. Why? This hasn't happened for quite a few years -- why now? I thought I had gotten it under control - wrong. anxiety today. ON A SATURDAY! What the heck?
I can't quit. It all can't come back. I've worked too hard. What now? How do I get my mind motivated again? It's competing with so many things. Breath..... Breath..... Breath.....
I've got to get back to the basics. I'm not going to sit 3 pounds away from a 50 pound loss and not achieve it. Fruits, veggies, water, dairy, low fat protein. Back to the basics. That means attending Weight Watchers-- not just weighing in.
I can do hard things! I have done hard things! I've come a long ways! COME ON!!!
Yes you can!! Just take a look at what you have already accomplished. That should be a huge motivator. You look great!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the support!
ReplyDelete