Running felt great this morning. Loved it! I have a friend who runs at the same time and we ran and talked the last mile and a half. Wow. Did that time go fast. I could have gone a lot longer.

Why are negative thoughts and attitude so easy? Why does that happen first and how do I train myself to have positive thoughts first? Saturday at my weigh in I was up a pound. Crazy. I felt like I had done great all week. Tracked everything. Negative. Giving up. Done. Eat bad. Negative thoughts. Why does that happen? Why didn't I kick it up a notch and say "Ok - I'll do better - let's go!"

I thought about last week - funnel cake, home made fries - twice. Stupid little Swedish fish. Even though I tracked the points I still ate some of these things. I was still within my points but not all points are equal. So abstinence is it - don't eat these things period. Perfection. Is it going to take perfection to keep loosing and maintain. Perfection and thought of perfection blows my mind. I can't imagine keeping up perfection. This thought just gives me such anxiety. This is definitely something that I need to address and think about.

Behaviors and positive self talk -- I've got to shower but I'll be back. This has to get out of my mind and written down.